Home
Programs
About Susie
View Demo
Book Susie
Books & Products
Resources & Newsletters
FAQ's & Press
Contact Susie
Sign up for monthly
prevention news!
News of Hope email.
 
                                 

 

Welcome to November, 2009'News of Hope'!
November is a special month - the season's have changed, the day's are shorter, the holidays are coming near and we have the opportunity to be a bit more reflective and, we hope, more grateful!

November is also Parent Involvement Month, a time for parents to re-awaken their commitment to spending time with the kids, talking, listening, playing, coaching, helping with homework - remembering that the most important influence in a child (and even a teen's) life are their parents.

November can also be a time when the "stress" of the holidays, financial pressures and family issues can steal the very essence out of our holiday joy. It is a great time to remind ourselves of our choices when feeling overwhelmed, anxious or fearful in the weeks to come. Some ideas from

 De-Stress for Success®: The System:
1) Remember the HALT Principle
2) Keep your head over your feet and your thoughts in the present - tomorrow isn't here yet
3) Take a walk and breathe
4) Practice positive self-talk so you don't take other's negativity personally
4) Meditate
5) Take a moment to write down what you are grateful for!

November 2009 NEWS OF HOPE CONTENTS
. Helping Your Preteen Cope with Feeling Left Out
. Holiday SPECIAL from LEGACY
. Alcohol the Real Date Rate Drug
. Join Susie on FACEBOOK
. TEXT SPEAK - Affecting Teen Communication Skills
. THANKSGIVING FALL PHOTOS TO SAVOR!

Pictured above:
Pic 1: T.C. Roberson High School, Ashville, NC - assembly for grades 9-12, several hours with teens eager to talk about personal concerns, and a well-attended community evening program - all coordinated by the outstanding mom's of the PTSO (in pic) with special acknowledgement to Cathy Steinbeck - one motivated mom!
Pic 2: T.C. Roberson students artistically expressed their appreciation!
Pic 3: Two incredible parent-teen evening programs were held at St. Matthew Catholic Church in Charlotte, NC, sponsored by the Church and two well-respected treatment centers Pavillon and Dilworth Treatment Center. Thanks to the 900 youth and parents that came out to improve their mutual communication!
Pic 4: Another successful community evening event, sponsored by Pavillon, at the Scottish Rite Temple in Greenville, SC.
Thanks, Pavillon!

To view past newsletters...

Helping Your Preteen Cope with Feeling Left Out

Website for Preteen Parents covers every subject!

From their article: Helping Your Preteen Cope with Feeling Left Out

As preteens move beyond a fully ego-centric phase of "all about me" to a world with higher and higher expectations (family, school and basic responsibilities), life can be disconcerting, to say the least. At the same time, a tween's social context will most likely turn to navigating an evolving "landscape" of peer-oriented challenges; most notably, "How do I fit in?". Many experts, according to Carma Haley Shoemaker in "Just Not Cliquing", believe that a child tries to find his/her place in a social group, starting at about age eight and continuing into middle school. The news flash is, we've all been there!

According to TweenParent.com, there are strategies that parents can employ to guide their children in dealing with feeling left out by a friend or a group of friends. For their suggestions, Visit the site at link below.

Picture: Evening performance in Greenville, SC at Scottish Rite Temple - community program with involved and friendly preteens pictured here with Susie :)

http://www.tweenparent.com


 

HOLIDAY SPECIAL!

Don't let holiday stress or the 2010 Economy get you or your friends down!

50% off on DE-STRESS FOR SUCCESS®: THE SYSTEM
through Dec. 31st PLUS
TWO FREE DOWNLOADS (mp3 files for your iPod!):

1 - Guided Meditation by Dr. Ken Vanderlip in his soothing
deep resonant voice
2 - Guided Meditation by Susie Vanderlip with an emphasis on
self-nurturing and compassion
(Susie and Ken Vanderlip are Certified Instructors in
Actualism meditation)

Retail: $159.95 --- SPECIAL!! $80.00 plus S&H

Contents: 230-page De-Stress for Success Workbook
CD - multiple guided meditations and tools
Special CD - Inner Advisor guided meditation
for effective problem solving
DVD - Yoga for the Office, Progressive Muscle Relaxation, Emotional Self-Defense and more!

Make your HOLIDAY Purchases Now!

__________________________________________________________________                



Alcohol the Real Date-Rape Drug, Study Says

News Summary from Join Together, October 29, 2009

Women who have lost control or consciousness due to excessive drinking have fueled what British researchers have termed the "urban legend" of drinks being spiked with so-called "date-rape" drugs, according to a new study.

The Telegraph reported Oct. 27 that Kent University researchers who studied 200 students found that many blamed their incapacitation on alleged spiking of drinks with drugs like Rohypnol or GHB when, in fact, they had drank to excess. Researchers concluded that many drinkers were in denial about their level of alcohol use and its debilitating effects.

Three-quarters of those surveyed cited drink spiking as a major risk in sexual assault -- far more than saw the risk in being drunk, taking drugs, or walking alone at night. But police say there's no evidence that rape victims are commonly drugged before attacks.
"Young women appear to be displacing their anxieties about the consequences of consuming what is in the bottle on to rumors of what could be put there by someone else," said researcher Adam Burgess. "The reason why fear of drink-spiking has become widespread seems to be a mix of it being more convenient to guard against than the effects of alcohol itself and the fact that such stories are exotic -- like a more adult version of 'stranger danger.'"

"We would be very interested in finding out whether the urban myth of spiking is also the result of parents feeling unable to discuss with their adult daughters how to manage drinking and sex and representing their anxieties about this through discussion of drink spiking risks," added researcher Sarah Moore.
The study was published in the November 2009 issue of the British Journal of Criminology.

Correction: The original version of this summary erroneously stated, "But police say there's no evidence that rape suspects are commonly drugged before attacks." This should have referred to rape victims. The error, which we regret, has been corrected; thanks to our readers for alerting us to the mistake.

This article summarizes an external report or press release on research published in a scientific journal. When available, links to the sources are provided above.

COMMENTS ON THIS ARTICLE:
Posted by Debra on 30 Oct 09 10:13 AM EDT
I have been a Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner (SANE-A, SANE-P certified through IAFN) for 10 years. I agree completely with the finding in this study. It is however, very difficult to prove if drugs were involved in the rape. Because the urine/blood screens, in many instances, are not sensitive enough to pick up a one time/single dose of a drug in a patients urine/blood. Many drugs when used in combination with alcohol to potentiate its effects are not even screened for in some screening panels---Benadryl for example. A patient generally report several hours after the incident especially if drugs or alcohol, in excess or by malice, is involved because they are unresponsive and unaware of what happened. The first urine may be missed and the subsequent urine may not contain enough metabolite to show positive on screening. During a sexual assault exam is the the right time to be doing drug or alcohol interventions with the patient. Many clients feel guilty and shamed regarding the event. Our focus is on the clients health and safety, physical, emotional and medical well being and reempowering them to regain a sense of control in their life. With that said it is important to also remember that even if a client is extremely intoxicated, under there own doing, sexual assault is a crime. And a client who is intoxicated certainly does not have the mental capacity to consent to sexual contact.

Posted by Vetanalyst on 30 Oct 09 10:50 AM EDT
This reinforces the need to increase public understanding of basic concepts of intoxication, its effects, and risks posed to health and safety. These concepts have been applied to impaired driving and underage drinking, but many other life situations are ignored or trivialized as harmless fun and desirable "socializing."

Read article at Join Together

LEGACY OF HOPE® is all about 'HEALTHY CHOICE' skills and awareness.


TEXT SPEAK - Affecting Teen Communication Skills
According to Sonya Hamlin, author of How to Talk So People Listen: Connecting in Today's Workplace, "We are losing very natural, human, instinctive skills that we used to be really good at."

What she is referring to are the face to face verbal communication skills that are being exchanged for tweets and texts.

High school seniors being coached for college admissions interviews were found to give "extremely short and not informational" answers. "Nothing came out, really, because is such an unused skill."

Hamlin says it is because "they're not listening." Youth raised on texting and IM communicating are used to rereading texts and IM"s several times before answering. The spontaneous thinking and communication of phone chats or face-to-face conversation has been replaced by quips, icons, emoticons and quotes.

And text and IM shorthand is creeping into their conversations. One college freshman remarked how she may suddenly say in conversation, "Oh, LOL," - using "text-speak" for 'laughing out loud.' Not a good choice in a job interview, to be sure!

According to an article in USA TODAY on 5/29/2006, "A 2005 report for Achieve, a non-profit organization that helps states raise academic standards, found that 34% of employers were dissatisfied with the oral communication skills of high school graduates; 45% of college students and 46% of high school graduates who entered the workforce instead of college said they struggle with their public speaking abilities."

Phone companies say that "text is the new talk" and our communication is becoming cryptic with at a 160-character text-message limit.

Parents share that the family phone doesn't ring much any more. That may be peaceful, but there is no way to monitor who is talking to who anymore or how often. Which, as Denise Witmer quotes the Monterey Herald in her article Text Messages Keep Teens From Sleeping on About.com,
"Nearly a quarter of teens in a relationship have communicated with a boyfriend or girlfriend hourly between midnight and 5 a.m. via cell phone or texting.One in six communicated 10 or more times an hour through the night."
And this from a survey in 2007 - texting has increased multi-fold since then.

Text-messaging can cause sleep deprivation in teens and negatively impact academic achievement. Which is why it is recommended that your teen's cell phone charger be in the parents' bedroom where it resides from, say, 10pm to 6:30am.



Some teen boys who find it easier to communicate with texting, since chatting with girls isn't easy for many. Texting removes the need to develop chatting skills with girls for awhile. Though girls say it's hard to tell a guy's real level of interest without any verbal cues - and some guys just text incessantly and become annoying!

Good article for more insights into ideas for parents as to how to handle cell phone use and texting privileges with teens:


Parenting Teens Article on About.com


 

 

CELEBRATING THANKSGIVING WITH YOU AND THE COLORS OF FALL!
Asheville in the fall is a photographer's delight! Hope you enjoy colorful moments we experienced along the Blue Ridge Mountain Parkway :)

Our Thanksgiving blessing to you all!
Susie and Ken
See more of Asheville Fall here!



TIME TO BOOK LEGACY OF HOPE for 2009-2010!!
This is a cut-to-the-chase message for today's youth, parents and adults who work with kids and families - a profound message of hope, emotional wisdom, and resiliency.

LEGACY OF HOPE® stimulates positive communication between schools, parents and teens while motivating young people to healthy choices.

Create awareness and re-ignite HOPE in the lives of children, adults and families - because we all need to know that someone out there understands our struggle and cares.

LEGACY OF HOPE® can help! Give us a call at 800-707-1977 or online.

To Contact Susie and LEGACY
 
From all of us at LEGACY ...
Susie Vanderlip, CSP, CPAE - Ken Vanderlip, PhD 
Newsletter
Assistant: Yuri Choi

800-707-1977
Back Top
Home | Programs | About Susie | View Demo | Book Susie
Books & Products
| Resources & Newsletters | FAQ’s & Press | Contact Susie
© 2006 Legacy Of Hope®. All rights reserved.